A dry month later, Wasted returns to The Waste Land. Reason for the hiatus, you ask? None. Excuses? Galore!
An eventful month it has been. No actually, not that eventful. Just one event. One infinitesimal bump in the smooth waveform of the Universe! I got divorced.
We have been separated three years and this was inevitable. It was just waiting there, biding its time. (I hate to call it fate.) I have known her for more than ten years now and its sad that this is the way it had to end. But such is life. It takes its own course, quite separate from our own hopes and aspirations. And we have to play along – we have to let it take control. For fighting is futile, and quite absurd if you ask me.
It has been a wonderful ride these ten years. It had its downs and its ups. I guess, in summing up, the downs outnumbered the ups a bit. But I don’t even understand anymore whose fault it was. Let us just say, as it is often said, it didn’t work out. But rather than ‘hanging on in quiet desperation’, I decided to kill it. Am I proud of my courage? Courage, you say. It could probably be called quite the opposite. But labels do not bother me. Let us just say, I am glad I did it.
When at the court room, the judge finally, after hearing us, said, “Thik ache (All right then)! If that is the way it has to be”, relief was the first emotion that rushed into my brain, though not completely untouched by a certain inexplicable sadness. And then when outside, she took my hand in a kind of an awkward handshake and pulled me towards her and kissed me on my cheek and said something like, “Ok then. Goodbye.”, I knew an era had ended. A part of my life died then and there, like it never before had. I have lost near ones to Death before – this is the first time I lost one to Life.
But, like I said, I am glad I did it. I am glad that it is finally over and I can move on with my life. It feels like waking up, after a long hibernation, to life’s possibilities once more. Let life take me somewhere new, somewhere I have not been before. For that is the great promise of Life – Life itself.
As I find myself fond of saying nowadays, “I am ready to make my next mistake!” A haseen galti (loosely translated as a ‘beautiful mistake’) probably!